So… here it goes my first blog. I don’t think that this blog will be dedicated to anything in particular, just life the “unscripted” kind. I write a lot in my journal and figure that I might as well share some thoughts and stories with the people I love. And hopefully they will love to read it! So here it goes…
Today in Spanish class we talked about words used to describe people. We learned where everyone in our “familia” or class was originally from, where we all live now. We learned each others birthdays and how old we are. We learned about each others “special someone”. It is at this point that I realized, and it didn’t help that the teacher brought it to my attention… that I am the only one who is not from Wichita, I am oldest one in the class by 3 years, that I am the only one in the class that is single and that I am to only girl who is not engaged. That’s right my 20 and 21 year old female classmates are all planning weddings. This really depressed me at first. But then I realized I’m not with anyone right now because the right guy either hasn’t materialized yet or he is there and to scared to say anything or doesn’t even know I’m there.
I know that “he” will be in my life eventually. But it is so hard right now to believe that God has made the perfect man for me and that he is out there. I just hope that when he does show up that God gives me a clear idea that it is him and that God shows him the same thing in me.
I know that I worry about things way too much sometimes. But honestly I am just ready for the life that I have always dreamed of to start. I am just afraid that when this man does finally materialize will I be too scared to trust my true feelings? Will I not realize that it is him? Will I let the scars from past relationships dictate how I handle new ones?
Dear God,
Please give me the strength to make your plan happen. Give me love in my heart to completely and unconditionally love another. Give me the strength to know that I deserve better than what I have had in the past. And give me a trusting heart and mind.
A) I am your first follower :o) WooHoo!
ReplyDelete2) I completely understand how you feel. When the young'ns seem to be getting settled before you, it is hard to be at rest in the path GOD is taking you down. Have faith, GOD has amazing things in store for you. You have also encouraged me here :o)